Barry Bones

Colombia Part 2: Ibague - Armenia - Manizales

2010-08-11T13:39:00.006-04:00

After a brief lunch of freshly-fried empanadas in Central Bogotá, I hopped a taxi through the city's insane traffic and booming road construction to the bus terminal. The gastronomic experience that has been my Colombian vacation so far continued as I struck up a conversation with the taxi driver about the strange tropical fruit I have been enjoying in the city. He noted that granadilla was absent from my list, and immediatly stopped at a fruit market to buy me one. It was tasty.

Once at the bus station I used 'minutos'—paying by the minute to use someone's cellphone—to call Juan's cousins in Ibagué to tell them when I will be arriving. According to the Lonely Planet and everyone I spoke with, the trip should take about four hours. In a typical tourist move, I hopped the first bus that said 'Ibagué' and expected it to take precisely that long. Unfortunately, I chose the AutoFusa 'mochiliero' that stops every five minutes. The four hour trip thus took six, causing unnecessary worry to my host family when I arrived two hours after dark. I fought off hunger with fruit-stuffed bread and plantain chips purchased through the bus window.

Along the way I met an economist who worked for Acción Social, an arm of the Office of the President that assists Internally Displaced Persons (IDPs) in the country. Colombia has roughly 4 million IDPs—10% of the total population—as a result of the 50-year old 'conflicto armado'. Although the origins of the conflict and the factors that sustain it are too complex to discuss in a blog post, suffice to say that leftist guerillas and in a longstanding war against a central government that has historically employed ultra-right paramilitary groups to do its dirty work. Adding to this conflict is a process that scholars call the 'normalization' or democratization of violence, whereby the use of violence as a means of social control spreads beyond the belligerant parties into broader society. Thus many of the officially disbanded paramilitaries continue to operate as 'illegally armed groups' who are available for hire to drug cartels, business people, and politicians who want to dispose of their enemies. This industry— along with the nation's lucrative coca fields—creates a sort of inertia that sustains the armed conflict far beyond the realm of political difference. Caught in between are the middle-class victims of extortion by guerilla and paramilitary alike—though that threat has waned in recent years—and the peasant campesinos who are forced off their land by both groups as well.

The mandate of Acción Social is to offer interim and long-term assistance to the desplazados, while conducting research and advocacy to promote their right to return to their land. My friend on the bus meets with such families who carve out a meagre living in the slums of Bogotá: he identifies their needs, tracks their land claims, and facilitates the distribution of government subsidies. All of this fits within the wildly popular former President Alvaro Uribe's democratic security policy, which has paired increased police and national guard activity with economic liberalization and an expanded social safety net. The rapid decrease in violence significantly contributed to the election victory of President Juan Manuel Santos, Uribe's successor and former Defence minister who took office last week. Although Uribe's two terms in office were not without serious scandal, the fact that Colombia is today considered a premiere tourist destination exemplifies how only idiotic gringo communists could suggest that his impact on the country has not been—in the aggregate—a positive one.

(On the topic of idiotic gringo communists, I saw a group of them protesting in front of a Colombian military base on the highway between Bogotá and Ibagué. Apparently they consider the presence of U.S. troops in Colombia to be unwelcome foreign interference, but their own presence in the country is just fine as they are showing solidarity with the Colombian people. These Colombian people, so in need of solidarity, were notably absent from the demonstration.)

My destination Ibagué, a city of just of 500,000, is the capital of the Tolima department in central Colombia. Due to its lower elevation it is quite hot during the day, such that my host family showers in cold water despite living in a home that would be considered luxurious by Canadian standards. Due to its absense from the Lonely Planet guidebook, it is considered to be 'off the gringo trail'—in fact, I did not see another foreigner nor speak a word of English during the three days I spent there. While the city itself is somewhat limited in tourist attractions, it does boast a prestigious classical music conservatory that performs symphonies from such greats as Mozart and Dvorak every Thursday night, free of charge. I cannot comment on the bar scene because it was a dry city as a precaution against violence during the Presidential transition.

During a truck-ride up from Ibagué to my friends' cottage in Tolima canyon I was able to sample some more of Colombia's typical dishes. Tamales are pouches of banana or plantain leaves stuffed with various potatoes, vegetables, and meats according to the region; while kumis is a yogurt-like drink made of fermented milk that I am told made its way to Colombia from Central Asia about thirty years ago. Both are available from the supermarket, but are much tastier when purchased from a roadside restaurant where they are made from scratch.

After a couple of days in Ibagué, my trek resumed in the city of Armenia in Colombia's famous coffee-growing region. The bus-ride between these two cities passes over La Línea, a mountainous ridge well over 3km above sea level that is notorious in the region for its beautiful scenery and trecherous driving conditions. An 8.5km tunnel and a bridge are currently under construction that when completed are expected to reduce travel time by about an hour and decrease the number of traffic accidents. Since they are currently incomplete, I was treated to the winding roads and traffic jams that will soon be banished to the history books.

From Armenia with Juan's mom I made day trips by car to 6 of the 11 municipalities in Qunidío department. Local attractions include the Disneyland-like Panaca and Parque Nacional del Café; the market town of Salento; and the peaceful town of Filandia whose population of 15,000 proudly boasts its fifth year without a single murder. The town's central square was a hopping place when we rolled up, only to be deserted ten minutes later as the crowds poured into the cathedral for Sunday mass. New foods in Quindío included lechón—a suckling pig stuffed with rice and veggies; two types of fermented drinks made of corn and cane sugar respectively; and a bland fruit from a palm tree that tasted somewhat like squash.

The highlight of Quindío is the Botanical Gardens, which boasts a butterfly conservatory and insect museum. Staff there have an ambitious plan of collecting at least one sample of each of Colombia's 230 species of palm tree. Visitors are made aware that the biodiversity of Colombia is unmatched anywhere in the world: consider for instance that there are over 4,000 known species of orchid in the country, with many more undiscovered.

I currently write from an Internet café in downtown Manizales, which is connected to the bus terminal by a brand-new gondola system. This vibrant mountain city of about 300,000 is among the safest in Colombia. I will take a brief Spanish lesson tomorrow afternoon, then head to Medellín on Friday—a day which also marks the mid-point of my trip. I'll post some more photos in the coming days.

Colombia Part 1: Bogotá

2010-08-01T12:04:00.007-04:00

My Colombian adventure begins with a crude 3AM wake-up call in my parents' basement, followed by a 2.5 hour airport shuttle to Detroit, a 2 hour wait, a 2 hour plane ride, another five hour wait, then a six hour plane ride. How happy I was to see the smiling faces of my friend Paola and her cousin Iván waiting for me when I landed in Bogotá at 10PM the following evening.

By taxi we travelled to Paola's aunt's place, a modest apartment with beautiful antique furnature tucked away in this sprawling mountain metropolis of 8 million. After a greasy snack of sausage and arepas from a local fast-food joint, I slept like a baby.

The next day Paola and Diego—another friend from my high-school days in Londombia—took me on a tour of the northern part of the city. This classy end of town is equipped with luxury apartments on a backdrop of lucious green mountains, and shopping malls that put most Canadian cities to shame. The brief sojurn into the daily haunts of Bogotá's upper middle class provided decent training for the evening: a birthday party at a dance club in La Zona Rosa.

Zona Rosa provides the visitor with the same awesome feeling that you get on Richmond Row in London or in Byward Market in Ottawa: damn, being young kicks ass. Now multiply that times a thousand, because this place is HUGE! You all know that I'm not a fan of dance clubs, but when in Rome... The two-room bar had one DJ spinning a mix of reggaeton and Latin pop music, while the other was pure House. American rap videos played on the big screen in the first room, while shots from Tiësto and Deadmau5 concerts—intersperced with some very strange porn—filled the second. Colombians are expert dancers when it comes to Latin music, but if you play Hip Hop or House they are as clueless as the rest of us. Grinding is taboo here, but for some reason dry-humping each other face-to-face is not. All in all, North Bogotá is a WORLD-CLASS party scene if you don't mind paying $5 for a beer or $300 for a bottle of tequila—they don't sell shots individually. For hippies like me, it's a pretentious place that makes Up on Carling feel like the the Poacher's Arms. The booze-fuelled night put me $50 in the hole, and left me rather apprehensive about hiking around a sacred lake at high altitudes with Paola's extended family the following day.

Underlying the prosperity and optimism apparent in the wealthy north, there is a country with deep social divisions and grinding inequality. This was apparent even before I left Canada, not for Colombia's well-hidden poverty but for its extravagant displays of wealth and privilige. My neighbour on the airport shuttle to Detroit—a young golfer heading to Indianapolis—told me that he travels to Bogotá every year to visit a rich guy who is friends with Donald Trump. They get an armed escort to pick them up at the airport, which travels in a police-authorised convoy to luxury ranch just outside the city. I would have dismissed these tales as the product of exaggeration had I not met a rich kid from Florida on second leg of my flight who was heading down to visit his girlfriend. He was unable to give me any advice on taxis because she has a driver to take them around the city. Upon our arrival, the kid was escorted away by two men in tuxedos while the other 227 passengers walked down a long hallway to the even longer lineup at Customs. Coming from a country where millionaires and homeless people wait for service in the same emergency room, this all seemed very strange.

***

Okay, forget about family day at the lake. On Sunday morning I snuck out of Paola's aunt's house exhausted and hungover after a long night of drunk dancing in La Zona Rosa. The plan was for the taxi to take me to a hostel in the historic Candelaría district, but most of the streets were closed for a marathon, meaning I had to walk. The marathon was a bit disorganized: people seemed to be running around in all directions, stopping and starting again at random intervals. It is also the only time you will see a non-tourist wearing shorts in Bogotá. Arriving at my hostel, I paid COP20.000 a night (about $11) for a bed in an 8-person dorm in a cool neighbourhood that gets seedy at night. Unlimited coffee, tea, a maté de yerba is also included. No more partying with the Estrato Seis; it's museum time in gringoland.

Yesterday I took a quick walk through the Military Museum. Not much to see besides old guns and cardboard models Apache helos, but the uniformed soldiers headbanging to Sean Paul at the front desk were funny enough to make the visit worthwhile. Next is the Museo Botero, an art gallery dedicated to its epynonymous Colombian artist who specializes in round and fat things: pears, watermelon, fat people, and fat animals. The highlight was a magnificient sculpture of a fat woman having sex with a swan, as well as some of the lesser known works of Dali, Monet, Picasso, and others.

I am currently writing from an Internet café in the eastern part of the downtown core. The somewhat downtrodden area is filled with shops selling just about everything, and my roast chicken lunch cost COP4.200—about $2.50. For some reason Colombians don't eat vegetables, though the fresh juice and ice cream of exotic fruits—maracuya, feijoa, guanabana, curuba—more than make up for it. I'm now off to find a place to buy and send postcards, which is a difficult task in a country with no national postal service. I'll hopefully post the first round of pictures this evening. Tomorrow its off to Ibagué, then Armenia in the coffee-growing district by Friday.

Israeli Apartheid Week at Carleton

2010-02-26T19:01:00.013-05:00

©mørland/the times

I live on campus at Carleton University. It's a nice place to live...most of the year.

Next week however will surely bring the annual ritual showdown between pro-Israel and pro-Palestinian students in the Atrium. Each side will be handing out pamphlets featuring the exact same map: one labeled 'Israel' and the other 'Palestine.' (Not much room for compromise when each claims the right to 100% of the other's land, eh?) It's extremely annoying that people intentionally attempt to disrupt the social harmony of the university community by arguing over a pointless conflict on the other side of the world. To use a nice piece of modern vernacular: STFU!

Make no mistake: the activists who will be mobilizing for both sides next week are much more radical than the average person in the countries that they claim to represent. They have a glorified image of one side and a demonized image of the other. Many of them will be actually non-students and strangers to campus, but they will feel that it's their moral imperative to impede on our space in order to (mis)inform us about a stupid fight we don't give a damn about. It's basically the PFLP versus the Kahanists; the moderates on both sides stay far, far away.

...and now we have the Citizen adding fuel to the fire by giving the event free sensationalist publicity, just in time. Gee, thanks.

As undignified as the next week will be for all involved, to call it a "hate-fest" is rather hyperbolic. The tension will certainly reflect a major division between the radical left and the radical right in the campus political culture, but religion and ethnicity have little if anything to do with it. The leader of 'Students Against Israeli Apartheid' (SAIA) is Jewish himself, just as there are Muslims and Christians on the pro-Israel side. While I certainly agree that comparing Israel to apartheid-era South Africa (or the PLO to Al Qaeda) is totally beyond the pale, I nevertheless take some offence to the suggestion that my community is a hotbed of racism, anti-Semitism or Islamophobia.

SAIA is a certainly a radical political group, but they're essentially communists, not Nazis. Likewise, the pro-Israel people are passionate Zionists but this doesn't make them racist against Arabs. Campuses are among the most diverse communities in all of Canada, and by and large we manage this complex relationship much better than you idiots out there in the real world. It's annoying when outsiders who don't understand our culture accuse our whole community of racism based on the statements of a few people who sent them an e-mail outlining their own agenda. My current roommates are an Israeli and an Iranian who get along just fine—off campus that seems strange, but here it's normal. Don't let a spat between two tiny groups of radicals serve as your description for our entire campus. To repeat: 99% of us don't give a damn.

Hopefully there will be some humour to lighten things up a bit. Last year the "no-man's-land" between the Israeli and Palestinian groups was delineated by a feminist club selling tickets to a stage show called 'the Vagina Monologues.' Imagine two groups of angry activists converging around a 10-foot sign that says "VAGINA!" in bold letters. I remember the Ottawa Citizen photographer complaining to his colleague that he couldn't get a decent shot of both groups facing off without including the vagina sign. They left disappointed that no scuffles broke out like at York the week before. Douchebags!

So to all you pro-Israeli and pro-Palestinian groups out there: play nice and tell your 40-year-old non-student buzz-kill friends to stay home. If you don't, I'll smother you all with my meaty beef curtains.

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I'm still alive

2010-02-24T05:13:00.002-05:00

Hello out there in bloggerland.

I'm sorry that this blog has been on hiatus. School has been HECTIC! When classes end and exams are over I'll get back into blogging. Until then, I suggest http://www.vbs.tv for entertaining info about the weird and wonderful world.

Suaad Hagi Mohamud: What Really Happened?

2009-09-29T00:40:00.016-04:00

After weeks of discussion about the size of Suaad Hagi Mohamud's lips, Canadian consular officials in Kenya have released a little bit more information about why they believed that she was not the Canadian citizen that was pictured on her passport. The allegations are shocking:

In one interview with the Canadian High Commission in Nairobi, Mohamud indicated she was a student at Humber College and was studying fashion design. But in another interview, she denied it and said she was only thinking about going to school at Seneca College. The documents allege she lacked knowledge about Toronto, where she had lived for 10 years. She couldn't name Lake Ontario, and even though she took public transit to work, she had trouble explaining the acronym TTC, the Toronto Transit Commission. She didn't know that the acronym for her Toronto workplace, ATS, stood for Andlauer Transportation Services. She also couldn't name the current or previous prime minister and was unable to describe in any detail how she obtained her driver's licence. The documents also allege she gave a wrong date for her son's birthday and couldn't provide details on the circumstances or place of his birth. [link]

If Canadian officials in Kenya were unable to confirm the "Canadian-ness" of the woman we have seen speak on the news, then there is a serious problem. In her interviews and testimonies, Ms. Mohamud speaks Toronto English with a moderate Somali accent--this should be easy to distinguish from someone who had never been to Canada. Moreover, in two hours of interviews with Canadian officials, Ms. Mohamud must have been able to say SOMETHING about the city in which she has lived for the past decade. Where does her son go to school? What grade is he in? What is his teacher's name? Who are the Maple Leafs? Where does she buy her groceries? How must does milk cost?

Clearly, something does NOT add up. I can advance two scenarios that would explain what really happened:

Scenario 1: Suaad Hagi Mohamud has a heart of gold and nerves of steel

The first possibility is that Ms. Mohamud has been honest through the whole ordeal, and that she was declared an impostor by Kenyan authorities due to her refusal to pay a bribe. The scheme would have gone something like this:

1. Canadian arrives at Kenyan airport security.
2. Kenyan official asks for bribe, Canadian refuses to pay.
3. Official imprisons Canadian, sells documents to Imposter.
4. Impostor pays bribe at gate.
5. Canadian officials flag Imposter, ask questions.
6. Imposter knows nothing about Canada.
7. Canadian still in jail.

Never underestimate how elaborate an extortion scam can be. If scenario is true, then my heart goes out to Ms. Mohamud. It would mean that she went to a Third-World prison for eight days due to her steadfast refusal to pay a bribe. She deserves an award for her bravery and her righteous indignation—I would have paid the bribe in a second.

Scenario 2: Suaad Hagi Mohamud has a heart of gold and a lot of nerve

The second possibility is that Ms. Mohamud is not telling the whole truth, and that there was indeed an attempt on her behalf to smuggle a third person into Canada. This trick would work as follows:

1. Canadian leaves for Kenya.
2. Canadian gives passport to Kenyan friend. (sister?)
3. Kenyan friend "returns" to Canada with Canadian passport.
4. Canadian reports passport missing in Kenya.

If this is the case then Ms. Mohamud is in a lot of trouble. I would not condemn her morally if she were only trying to help her sister, but it would take some arrogance to sue for $2.6m after managing to get away with an attempt at human smuggling. The government would want to make an example out of her in order to deter similar schemes; Ms. Mohamud would have to serve considerable jail time. This is would also impose undue hardship on her 12-year-old son in Toronto—he would be the real victim.

***

We can learn a few lessons from this fascinating story:

1. Airport officials in many countries are corrupt as hell, and will engage in elaborate and nasty schemes to coax money from honest and unsuspecting people. Bangkok is a classic case.

2. Although a Canadian passport is a great asset, first-generation Canadians face obstacles when attempting to use it to its full advantage. Not only is it more difficult for them to prove their "Canadian-ness" to our own officials, but they are more attractive as victims of robbery and extortion when visiting their families abroad. This is because their passports are more valuable as they needn't be altered, and extortionists expect them to "know the rules," i.e. pay bribes.

3. Every day, people are risking everything they have to bring themselves and their loved ones to the relative safety and prosperity of Canada. For someone born in this country, there is nothing more humbling than to hear the story of a refugee, the trials they have faced and continue to face, and the loved ones they've left behind. God bless them.

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The Third Great Debate in IR Theory: An Echo Perspective

2009-09-17T21:57:00.009-04:00

(Short reflection piece for 4th Year political theory class, handed in today. Citations removed for obvious reasons.)

In his 2003 address to the International Studies Association, Steve Smith argues that the discipline’s focuses on causation, rational actor theory, and state-centrism has served to promote the existing power structure to the detriment of those who do not hold its reins. Although generally valid, Smith’s call for more inquiry into “the meaning and subjectivities of individuals in [different] cultures” understates the extent to which these cultures and their interests are already intertwined. This ontological misunderstanding foreshadows an emerging paradigm shift in IR theory: the policy scholars of the Echo Generation will need to produce ideas with even more adaptability than Smith envisioned in his address.

In order to contextualize the forthcoming reality, let us begin by reviewing the tenets behind what Alexander Wendt calls ‘The Third Great Debate in IR Theory.’ On one side of the rift are the positivists, who seek to create knowledge by applying the rational methodologies of the natural sciences. On the other side are the post-positivists, who argue that there is no universal social reality in which rationality can exist; positive IR theories are thus merely conjectures derived from the prejudices of those who develop them. Although both approaches continue to produce useful knowledge, the former applies more to the relatively homogenous socio-political world of our parents and grandparents, while the latter only begins to shed light on the complexity of the society into which the Echo Generation was born and raised.

Scholars of the older generations have difficulty understanding the extent to which our social reality is heterogeneous. They view our environment as one occupied by many groups in a single social space, each having its own distinct identity and understanding. The positivists then explain the incompatibilities between ‘the West’ and ‘the other’ in terms of the latter’s “hangover from some earlier form of consciousness.” Likewise, Smith—a post-positivist—attributes the origin of intercultural clashes like the 9/11 attacks to the inability of Western theories to internalize issues affecting other societies. To the Echo Generation, this very distinction between ‘the West’ and ‘the other’ is a fallacy in itself: not only are we composed of individuals with different ethnicities, but within each individual is also a diverse array of conflicting identities and allegiances. International conflicts therefore manifest themselves not only in relations between states, but also within one’s peer group, one’s family, and oneself. Mainstream IR approaches do not help us understand these manifestations.

Given our novel circumstance, the questions asked by the Echo Generation in IR theory differ from those asked by mainstream IR theories. The older generations take a system for granted and attempt to explain changes using what Wendt calls “causative theories.” In contrast, the Echo Generation does not have the luxury of a preliminary point of reference. During the course of our coming-of-age, global politics has been driven by a constant succession of unpredictable events rather than a tractable series of policy choices. The primary objective thus shifts from a strategy of explaining the past and predicting the future to one of identifying and contextualizing each catalyzing event and learning to manage its immediate repercussions. For this reason, “constitutive theories” that describe the properties of such events will be of more practical use to the next generation of policymakers than the causal theories of centuries past.

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The History of Canadian Hip Hip

2009-09-01T00:51:00.035-04:00

K'naan relayed his frustration with the national hip hop scene in an August 13 interview with the Canadian Press. The Somali-born, Toronto-based rapper was asked to reflect on his second Polaris Music Prize nomination, and in particular on the fact that he is one of only three rappers to ever make the prestigious shortlist. (The other two are Edmonton's poet laureate Cadence Weapon in 2006; and London’s hometown hero Shad in 2008.) Needless to say, K'naan seems to be trying to give his compatriots a not-so-subtle kick in the ass:

So we have to be kind of honest ... I know that there's a k-os album out, I know that there's a Classified album out, you know what I mean, but all the other guys we're talking about that have got their little studios in Toronto - it's nice and all, but where's the music? (link)

K'naan didn’t name any of "the other guys" specifically, but I'll speculate as to who they are at the end of this post. Setting aside the internal spats, the purpose of this blog is to tell stories. To that end, here is a brief history of Canadian hip hop, courtesy of yours truly. My sincere apologies to those who are omitted: it's not that no one remembers you, it's just that you slipped my mind at the moment.

Pre-1996: The Early Years
Maestro Fresh-Wes of Toronto was the first Canadian rapper of note, famous for his 1989 hit 'Let Your Backbone Slide'. At that time there was no urban radio in Canada, and a Toronto-based CRTC application in 1990 was denied in favour of a country station. Apparently our national culture experts thought that more people in Toronto listened to country than to urban music. You can be forgiven for calling them racist, but this won't be an isolated incident. For the next eight years the scene was kept alive by weekly one-hour shows on campus radio, as fans across the country waited for something awesome to rise from the ashes. For their part, the artists kept busy by making dope music...

In 1991, Main Source released Breaking Atoms. The 4-man crew consisted of two Canadian-born DJs backing two New York-based MCs. The album will go down in history for featuring a 17-year-old Nas in his first recorded track, "Live at the Barbecue.” However, much like Snow’s collaborations with MC Shan, the album is best understood as an extension of the NYC scene, rather than a pure Canadian production in itself.

As for the latter moniker, Vancouver-based Rascalz released Really Livin' in 1992—the title track is still on my playlist. Ghetto Concept also had their first Canadian hit around this time, winning two Juno's in 1995 and 1996. Meanwhile, the Dope Poet Society was making protest songs with Dead Prez, and Montreal’s Dubmatique was rockin’ the francophone scene—albeit in European French. It would only be fair to mention Tom Green at the point as well. You might know him for shock comedy, but in 1993 his crew basically founded the 613 scene with their MuchMusic hit, "Check the O.R." Tom still freestyles with the best of them on his online variety show.

1996-2000: The Boom
I would argue that the seminal release for the Canadian hip hop scene was the 1996 compilation Rap Essentials Volume One. This introduced us to characters such as Choclair, Kardinal, Citizen Kane, and Dan-e-o, and formally moulded them into the scene that was established by Rascalz and Ghetto Concept. The music had a stronger West Indian flavour and a more optimistic—if abstract—message than its American counterpart. A distinct regional style was forming that the Canadian music establishment could no longer ignore. ...but it would still try.

Military historians say that the Battle of Vimy Ridge represented the founding of the Canadian national identity. The Vimy Ridge of Canadian hip hop was the 1998 Juno Controversy. Rascalz won the Rap category, but they arrived too late to receive the trophy as it was handed out before the televised gala. Misfit and Red1 refused the award in disgust, citing racism as the reason that their genre was snubbed.

This demand for attention needed a soundtrack to back it up, and Rascalz obliged. They teamed up with Choclair, Checkmate, Kardinal and Thrust to create a masterpiece. (k-os and Jully Black were invited as well, but they couldn't make it.) “Northern Touch” became the Canadian hip hop anthem, and to this day represents the beginning of Canada’s own golden era. Needless to say, the 1999 Juno Awards featured a televised performance.

Post-2000: Diversification
Northern Touch featured acts from both Toronto and Vancouver, but this is a big country. Since that release, artists from other cities gained national prominence, and the unique underground scenes that had emerged over the previous decades suddenly became interconnected via the Internet. Canadian hip hop conquered its inferiority complex and, like the country as a whole, started to celebrate its diversity.

Rascalz and Checkmate were joined in Vancouver by Sweatshop Union and Swollen Members. Halifax produced the likes of Buck 65, Classified, Sixtoo, Josh Martinez, and Universal Soul. Ottawa/Gatineau became dominated by the Nine Planets Crew, which featured DL Incognito, D-Shade, and Mic Check. Also of note are Winnipeg’s Grand Analog, London’s Governor Bolts, and Regina’s Ira Lee. For the francophones, Sans Pression produced the first real album in Québec street-slang (joual), and Joe BG (a.k.a. Mista Snake) became the first martyr. (RIP)

Post 2010: The Future
K’naan’s comments were probably directed towards Solitair, Saukrates, Thrust, and perhaps to D-Sisive—who recently emerged from the abyss. K’naan is right to ask where the genre is going, but he is being a little unfair. Due to his unique personal history, his folksy sound, and his freakish talent, he was fast-tracked by Canadian music elite in ways that his predecessors could have never dreamed. But at least he has the humility to cite his fellow artists and the predecessors who paved the way. Belly, on the other hand, baptised himself “the Godfather of Canadian Hip Hop” upon releasing his 2007 debut album. In light of the rich history described above, the appropriate (and hillarious) response to Belly's arrogance comes to us courtesy of Jane and Finch's Blacus Ninjah. Enjoy.

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Get ready for a dry, depressing fall.

2009-07-23T22:35:00.019-04:00

Yes, you read that properly: flavoured blunt wraps will be illegal, and unflavoured ones will only be sold in packs of 20. So if you like your vanilla-flavoured blunts, you better start writing your MP.

Get ready for a dry, depressing fall.

Young Canadians are generally proud of the quality and quantity of marijuana they smoke. We smoke more pot per capita than any Western country, and the drug is on the cusp of becoming socially normal. From Northern Lights #5 to White Lotus, some of the best strains of pot in the world were created by Canadian growers. By comparison, the pot that sells on the street in Atlanta or St. Louis is so gross that Canadians wouldn’t smoke it. That's right, Canada is a giant 420 party, complete with ketchup chips and poutine to cure the inevitable munchies.

But this fall, things won’t be nearly as fun as they have been. There are a few reasons:

Problem 1: Shitty fuckin' weather
A wet and cold summer in most of Eastern Canada is making for the worst outdoor season in years. Pot grows best in hot sun and well-drained soil; this cold and wet weather will reduce the outdoor crop by up to 20% if things don’t change soon. So if you’re expecting the fall market to be flooded with $120 ounces like it is most years, better revise those expectations.

Problem 2: SmartMeters
Ontario is implementing the SmartMeter program, which allows the hydro company to monitor electricity usage in 15-minute intervals. If the meter is temporarily disabled while a big-time grower sets up the bypass, police will be notified automatically and the grower will get busted. In the past, medium-sized grow houses that weren’t stealing electricity could conceal their excess power usage by saving energy in other ways. But soon HydroOne will be able to detect if a house’s power usage is running in 16/8 or 12/12 light cycles. That will be a dead giveaway that there’s a grow-op in the house, and more small-time growers will get busted as well. At this point no one is sure if the SmartMeter will be used in this way—or if it will work—but the whole industry is spooked already.

Problem 3: Bill C-15
Bill C-15 passed its final reading in the House of Commons on June 8th, and will move through the Senate when Parliament resumes this fall. One of its most controversial clauses is a mandatory six-month prison sentence for growing a single pot plant in your garden. Officially, this rule is void if the production is not for the purpose of trafficking, but if your harvest is greater than 30 grams, the tradition is to assume that it you're selling at least some of it.

The bill won’t stop the big-time growers that are connected to organized crime: they usually get jail time anyway. But it will cut down on the mom-and-pop houses and all of those homeowners who harvest a couple of pounds from their backyard every fall. These otherwise law-abiding citizens—and all of the friends they supply—will turn to the criminal market for their weed. This will drive prices up for everyone else.

For the record, the bill was passed with the support of most Conservatives and all Liberals. The NDP and the Bloc Quebecois were opposed. Think of that when their campaign teams come to your door.

Problem 4: Bill C-32
Bill C-32 has passed through the Committee stage in the House of Commons, and a vote is pending this fall. Also known as the Cracking Down on Tobacco Marketing Aimed at Youth Act, the intention of the bill is to ban the sale of individually-wrapped bubble-gum flavoured mini cigars, which politicians say are designed to entice kids to start smoking. As a side effect, the bill in its current form will also ban all flavoured blunt wraps and require that unflavoured ones be sold in packs of 20. Yes, you read that properly: flavoured blunt wraps will be illegal, and unflavoured ones will only be sold in packs of 20. So if you like your vanilla-flavoured blunts, you better start writing your MP.

***

So it looks like dire straits for the Canadian marijuana industry. The only thing we still have going for us is that the dollar has strengthened since the beginning of the year. Last winter, the tanking Canadian dollar was pushing prices up at the pound level as dealers moved their product south at a rate not seen since 2004. To the relief of stoners across the country, the dollar rebounded and the south-bound flow has mostly stopped.

But that's little solace considering the rest of this bullshit., ain't it? Better start stocking up on those vanilla blunts before its too late.

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You're not dying, you're just scared. Now wait your turn.

2009-07-21T23:59:00.016-04:00

The great doctors at the Mayo Clinic didn’t tell her that she was in no danger and could safely wait for her free procedure in Canada. They also didn’t forward her test results to her Canadian doctors—which would have been reasonable if they thought that her surgery should have been bumped up. Instead, they accepted her $100,000 payment and performed the surgery themselves.

United States President Barack Obama is spearheading a campaign to reform the American health care system, and the radical right is biting back as usual. Perhaps unsurprisingly, the neo-cons are getting a little help from Canada.

Ontario resident Shona Holmes appears in an advertisement for an ultra-conservative lobby group, claiming that she survived a brain tumour in spite of the Canadian government’s effort to have her die on the waiting list. Check it out:

The problem with this video is that it is blatantly incorrect. According to the Mayo Clinic’s website, Ms. Holmes had a Rathke's cleft cyst. As unsettling as it must be to hear that there is something growing in your brain, Ms. Holmes’s “tumour” was just a sack of fluid that had been there since she was a fetus. She wasn’t dying, she was just scared. Unfortunately, her specialist was too busy treating people whose lives were in jeopardy, so the evil Canadian health care system asked her to take Advil twice a day for six months until there was space in the schedule.

People often freak out over minor medical things. When this happens, they abandon their doctors and seek out snake-oil cures, looking for that miracle procedure that will sweep their problems away in an instant. Ms. Holmes is a case in point, as she says: “I knew in my gut that I had to see someone and could not wait five to six months.” (Emphasis added.) Notice that her doctor didn’t tell her that she would be dead in six months—she came up with that idea on her own. So she mortgaged her house and took a vacation to Arizona, where she visited one of the most expensive hospitals in the world, an institution reknown for treating business magnates, A-list Hollywood celebrities, former Presidents, and Mr. Burns.

The great doctors at the Mayo Clinic didn’t tell her that she was in no danger and could safely wait for her free procedure in Canada. They also didn’t forward her test results to her Canadian doctors—which would have been reasonable if they thought that her appointment should have been bumped forward. Instead, they accepted her $100,000 payment and performed the surgery themselves.

Once healed up, Ms. Holmes made a triumphant return to Canada and promptly sued OHIP for the cost of her treatment at the Mayo Clinic. She became a darling of the right in Canada, and has now moved on to muddy American waters.

To the Americans reading, I do not mean to say that the Canadian health care system is perfect. (Even if it were, it is very different from what Obama’s plan proposes.) We do have waiting lists, and sometimes they're long. Most of the doctors are still using handwritten paper records and snail-mailing x-rays to one another—they don’t like change. Hypochondriacs (usually richer people) waste time and resources with their frivolous visits. There is a shortage of GPs because everyone wants to specialize. Doctors need to do a better job at communicating with their patients. The lower-skilled staff in hospitals (porters, cafeteria, maintenance, etc…) are paid much more than their counterparts in other sectors due to union pressure. And finally, perhaps the biggest problem is that it is easier for a health insurance company to raise premiums than it is for a government to raise taxes.

The Canadian system is far from perfect, and change is needed. But in comparison to the United States, we are getting a pretty good bang for our buck. No system can solve every problem. Americans have waiting times too, you see—just ask Esmin Green how long she waited in the NYC Emergency room:

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Priests, Pharisees, Pedophiles, and the Prime Minister

2009-07-08T22:18:00.033-04:00

Prime Minister Stephen Harper caused some controversy today over video from the funeral of former Governor General Roméo LeBlanc. Harper took the Eucharist with one hand and held on to it, possibly because in some evangelical churches they wait until everyone has their bread before eating it. This was taboo in the Catholic tradition because one is supposed to stand at attention to accept the Eucharist with two hands, and then eat it immediately. Moreover, as a non-Catholic, Harper is not even entitled to receive Communion according to Church law.

Needless to say, some people were upset. Here is a video of the transgression posted on YouTube by one angry Catholic:

For those who are not familiar with the ins-and-outs of Catholic rituals, let me briefly summarize the story behind the tradition. On the day before He was to be executed, Jesus shared one last meal with his Disciples. He broke bread and passed around a cup of wine, (The Holy Grail) asking his friends to continue this tradition in memory of Him after His death. Catholics receive Communion (i.e. eat unleavened bread) at every Mass. In more traditional places they drink watered-down wine as well, but in modern-day Canada this practice is generally reserved to special occasions for reasons of hygiene and expediency.

It is important to realize that when Catholics receive the Eucharist, they believe that they are eating/drinking the actual body and blood of Christ. The Eucharist doesn’t symbolize Christ, it becomes Christ by transubstantiation when it is blessed by the priest. In this sense, Communion is a form of ritual cannibalism. There are several New Testament verses to support this belief, which are beautifully summarized in the hook of a French-Canadian communal hymn that I learned as a 7-year-old Catholic schoolboy:

Jesus nous a dit
En donnant le pain
«Prenez et mangez, ceci est mon corps»
Il a dit aussi
En donnant le vin
«Prenez et buvez, ceci est mon sang.»

Jesus said to us
Upon giving the bread
"Take this and eat, this is my body"
And he also said,
Upon giving the wine,
"Take this and drink, this is blood"

Non-Catholics are prohibited from receiving communion, but they are not completely excluded from the ritual. Guests at Mass are invited to come up to the altar with their hands crossed over their chests in order to receive a blessing. The priest will touch the person on the forehead or shoulder and whisper “God Bless You” or something to that effect. The appropriate response is ‘Amen’—which means ‘So be it’. Alternatively, the guest can remain at their seat if they so prefer. At most Catholic weddings and funerals, the priest will explain the hand signals in advance for those who are unfamiliar. It appears in this case that the small-town Acadian priest officiating at the funeral overlooked that courtesy, and poor Stephen didn’t know what to do. The Prime Minister can be forgiven for his error.

What bothered me about the whole incident is the way that many Catholics responded to it. I understand that some very religious people were upset because the body of Christ was chillin’ in the Prime Minister’s pocket. But in raising a stink about the issue, they are forgetting the some core tenets of their religion: humility, forgiveness, moderation, and support for the underdog. Jesus himself spoke out strongly against obsessing over ritual when the Pharisees caught his disciples crushing grain on the Sabbath:

"The Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath" (Mark 2:27)

In this verse, Jesus taught that religious rituals are designed to comfort the people who perform them. They do not exist because God wants to frustrate us with nonsensical rules, nor is He going to ‘break’ if we make a mistake in performing them. Too many Catholics (like people of many religions) have for centuries obsessed over the subtle nuances of their creed. This has turned them into modern-day Pharisees, and damaged the reputation of their entire movement. Christians need to drop all the dogmatic nonsense and return to the central message that their Messiah taught them:

'You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second resembles it: You must love your neighbour as yourself. On these two commandments hang the whole Law, and the Prophets too. (Matthew 22:37-40)

Post script

It might be surprising given this rather preachy post that I am a non-Christian. I renounced my faith at age 13, at which time the Bishop told my class that I was "committing spiritual suicide." Four years later, it was revealed that this same Bishop had responded to complaints about a pedophile priest by continually re-assigning him to different parishes.

The priest later pleaded guilty to sexually assaulting 47 young girls, and the Bishop died of old age.

God rest his soul.

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Hatin' on the Uyghurs

2009-07-06T22:35:00.011-04:00

"A group of Uyghurs decided to leave Xinjiang in search of a new life in the West. Unfortunately, they began their journey in August 2001, and ended up being sold to the Americans for bounty money and tortured at Guantanamo Bay."

I'm writing a brief post tonight because I still can't wrap my head around the Honduras situation.

Over the last couple years I've enjoyed watching Al Jazeera English over the Internet, since the network still isn't available on cable in Canada. I give it mixed reviews: at times it is unfairly anti-Israeli, but at other times it tells some compelling stories that would be hard to obtain from a network with a Western name. This post talks about one such story.

At the time of writing, hundreds of Uyghurs (pronouced WEE-ghers) in China's westernmost Xinjiang province are rioting. Depending on who you ask, they are either peaceful protesters upset about a killing, or a gang of bloodthirsty maniacs hacking away at innocent people with giant knives. (My guess is that both stories are at least partially true.)

I know nothing about Uyghurs or Xinjiang politics, so it is not my place to comment about what's going on. But Al Jazeera put out a great little documentary two years ago about a particular group of Uyghurs who set out from Xinjiang to seach for a new life in the West. Unfortunately, they happened to begin their journey in August 2001, and ended up being sold to the Americans for bounty and tortured at Guantanamo Bay. After some confusion and embarrassment they were sent to asylum in Albania, and a few of their countrymen have now ended up in Bermuda and Palau. Refugee claims to Canada for at least three of them are now pending, though the government is worried that accepting them could put a Canadian Uyghur imprisoned in China at risk.

The striking chain of events would be hilarious if it weren't so tragic. It's almost cute how humble men from a forgotten corner of the world can have their entire lives turned upside-down because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time. The story also brings us back to a time we would all prefer to forget: the terrifying hemmoraging of the American security establishment in the days, weeks, and months after 9/11.

...so if you have a half hour to kill, check out the documentary below, entitled "A Strange Kind of Freedom." Props to Al Jazeera for telling a great story, and for posting it on YouTube.

(click here for part 2)

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He Without Sin Cast the First Vote

2009-06-23T00:48:00.014-04:00

Today, it's a majestic castle in downtown London where couples pose for wedding photos. But until the late-19th Century, crowds used to gather there on warm summer evenings to witness public hangings.

Classical economics is based on the assumption that humans are generally rational and self-interested. Likewise, our justice system defines our responsibility towards others—our “duty of care”—by the extent that the consequences of our actions are “reasonably foreseeable.” This emphasis on reason and rationality has its roots in ancient Greece, and has formed the core of our identity as a modernist society. It also has a religious basis: according to Christian tradition, man is distinguishable from animal in that she possesses the God-like gift of reason.

Unfortunately for the Christians and the ancient Greeks, psychology is going in a different direction. Reason and rationality fail to explain human behaviour in many circumstances. Reasonable people don’t get angry at each other. Rational people don’t have to eat Kraft Dinner all week because they drank themselves broke at the Dominion Tavern on Saturday night. (Fuck!) Economists and psychologists have developed game theory experiments to mimic human interaction in a controlled environment. This helps them to identify when humans behave rationally, and when they deviate from that classical norm. They then use the theory of evolution in order to attempt to explain why we humans have come to behave in the strange ways that we do.

In 2002, the Swiss economists Ernst Fehr & Simon Gächter published a groundbreaking article about human social behaviour in the journal Nature. They designed a game theory experiment that allows participants to punish their fellow guinea pigs for refusing to contribute to the group’s common goal. Fehr and Gächter found that the participants were willing to pay money for the right to punish, even when they would have been better off themselves to just turn the other cheek. This experiment shows that humans act not only in the interest of themselves and their kin, but are also willing to make sacrifices in order to punish someone who wronged a total stranger. The authors concluded that this altruistic punishment, driven by negative emotions towards the social deviants, is an important factor in human cooperation. In other words, our instinctive and sometimes violent sense of righteous indignation is a core component of our social organization. This has both positive and negative repercussions. Tonight I will focus on the latter.

Public hostility towards wrong-doers has formed the basis of our justice system since its primitive beginnings. Individuals who violated social norms—theves, adulteresses, prostitutes, and murderers—faced beating, stoning, amputation and execution, often before a bloodthirsty public. This is as much a part of our own history as it is a reality in some parts of the world. Today, the old Middlesex County Courthouse is a majestic castle in downtown London where couples pose for wedding photos. But until the late-19th Century, crowds used to gather there on warm summer evenings to witness public hangings. They would get hammered in advance and shout insults at the condemned, laughing at his pleas of innocence in the last seconds before the force of gravity breaks his neck.

In our modern society of reason and rationality, these primitive instincts are supposed to have given way to a more humane form of justice. But populism sometimes overshadows humanity in politics, especially when there’s an election looming. Last week, Attorney General Rob Nicholson introduced a bill in the House of Commons that will limit the judge’s discretion in determining the sentence that best fits the criminal and the circumstances of the crime. The bill imposes a mandatory minimum six-month jail sentence for growing pot in your backyard; for stealing a car; for break-and-enter; for theft over $5,000; and for arson.

In removing the judge’s discretion, Mr. Nicholson is appealing to our evolutionary predisposition towards punishing wrongdoers. The problem with this approach is that it won’t reduce the crime rate. Criminals don’t commit crimes because punishments are too lenient; they commit crimes because they don’t think about the consequences of their actions. If we want to reduce the crime rate, we need to convince the criminals to act rationally and think ahead. Traumatizing them by throwing them in jail will have the opposite effect.

So don’t let Mr. Nicholson trick you. Criminals are not monsters to be slain; there is no such thing as monsters. Criminals are human beings that are every bit as complex as you and me. If our goal is to reduce the crime rate and make our communities safer, judges need to be given the discretion to apply the law in a way that best fits the circumstance.

But if our goal is to get more support from the bloodthirsty masses, then he without sin cast the first vote.

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Man-Love Thursdays on the Banks of the Arghandab

2009-05-27T01:10:00.019-04:00

"Hold my RPG, Omar, I’ll go get the lube. "

Many visitors to Afghanistan can’t help but notice that a remarkable amount of “gayness” exists just below the surface, especially in the more conservative areas. Perhaps the most colourful depictions come from the soldiers themselves, who have coined the term Man-Love Thursdays to describe what some of their Afghan counterparts do in their free time. The troops return with tales of local men trying to “put the moves” on their younger-looking comrades—nothing blows the ego of a chauvinist 18-year-old with an assault rifle more than having a hairy old Pashtun ask his ranking officer how much he costs. Alongside all the warlords and beardos, it was common even under the Taliban to see men frolic around dandily with henna on their nails and kohl in their eyes, as if they were getting ready from a theme night at Club 181.

These misunderstood, battle-weary fruitcakes have also made sporadic appearances in print. USAID worker Joel Hafvenstein wrote in 2003 that his employees in Helmand province would tell him how much they “like” the way he walks; while journalists Anderson and Dworzak learned in the early days of the invasion that “when crows fly over Kandahar, they clamp one wing over their bottoms, just in case.” As far back as the mid-19th century, the British explorer Richard Francis Burton recorded a common Central Asian expression: “Women for breeding, boys for pleasure, but melons for sheer delight.” Burton himself was rumoured to have been an avid player for both teams, due in part to his in-depth comparative studies of the “endowments” of various races of man. However exaggerated his writings might have been, the sheer number of supporting accounts spanning the next century demonstrates that gay sex in Kandahar province is much more than a one-off incident. In fact, some estimates put its prevalence at between ten and thirty percent.

In contrast to modern Western gay relationships—which generally take place between equals—most of the homosexuality practiced in Afghanistan takes the form of pederasty: sex between adult men and adolescent boys. Sometimes it is done in exchange for money, other times as a mentor relationship, and on occasion there is coercion or force. Orphans and boys from lower-class families are the most frequent targets, though scholars disagree whether this practice has more in common with traditional marriage or with prison rape. Gay-rights advocates are tempted to portray every incident as a Pashto-language sequel to Brokeback Mountain, while Taliban supporters argue that the NATO administration is acquiescing in a mass-rape of lower-class boys. The reality is somewhere in between: some of these relationships are consensual and beneficial to the personal development of the younger partner, while others are exploitative and damaging.

Pederasty hit a peak in the 1990s, during the chaotic time between the departure of Soviet forces and the ascent of the Taliban. In the early years, Taliban leader Mullah Muhammad Omar gained considerable public support by condemning the rape of males and females alike by certain mujahadeen commanders. Under Taliban law, those convicted of sodomy were executed by having walls pulled onto them by bulldozers. Harsh as this may be, the pot can be as black as the kettle: to guard against temptation, Omar banned his own troops from having beardless boys serve amongst them.

What lessons can we learn from this bizarre story? It tells us that sexuality is social phenomenon as much as a genetic one; our sexual morals and preferences depend in part on whether or not a particular behaviour is seen as “good” for society. In the West, gays and lesbians are generally productive citizens partaking in functional relationships; it therefore seems barbaric that someone in Afghanistan can be executed for being gay. But when Afghans think about homosexuality, they don’t think about two equal partners in a loving relationship. To them, homosexuality is when their son takes it in the ass from a rich man in exchange for free rides on his motorcycle. Sadly, it will take decades to change such perceptions in a society where sex is so taboo that it would make Grandma’s house feel more like Animal House.

The first priority for Afghan policymakers working in this field should be to develop a stronger jurisprudence against sexual exploitation in general. Once Afghans understand that the state will protect them from sexual violence, they might be more inclined towards tolerating (or at least talking about) different forms of the consensual variety. But this will take a long time. Until then, it looks like Man-Love Thursdays are here to stay.

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Somalia Pirates, We!

2009-05-03T14:01:00.015-04:00

Most of their rhetoric still reflects their vigilante roots: the bands have names such as “The Somali Marines” and “The Somali Coast Guard.”

On 25 September 2008, the Belize-flagged Ukrainian cargo ship MV Faina was hijacked by Somali pirates in the Gulf of Aden. The ship allegedly contained thirty-three refurbished Soviet tanks and an arsenal of automatic weapons, with a total value in excess of US$30 million. As the world powers struggle to find a way to deal with the Somali piracy problem, one voice that has been notably absent in the whole debacle is that of the Somali people. For an eloquent introduction to this perspective, please watch Somali-Canadian rapper K’naan’s interview with Hardknock.tv:

Accusations similar to those made by K’naan are seldom addressed in the international media—in fact, among the most accurate portrayals of the Somali pirate issue is a recent episode of South Park. The purpose of this post is thus to introduce the piracy problem and explain why it will persist for the foreseeable future.

Historically, Somalia’s lucrative tuna fishery has been its staple industry. In the absence of a state apparatus to patrol Africa’s longest national coastline, foreign fishing vessels began plundering Somali waters in the mid-1990s. Although their mere presence is a violation of international law, Somalis were particularly incensed by their use of illegal fishing methods, their dumping toxic waste, and their attacks on local fishing boats. The foreign ships come from a myriad of countries including France, Spain, Korea and Taiwan; together, they steal an estimated $300 million worth of fish annually.

Somali fishermen formed vigilante groups in response, which attacked foreign vessels and extracted “fines” for illegal fishing. As fish stocks declined, the vigilantes quickly learned that merchant ships provided much more lucrative ransoms than fishing boats. Various warlords also got involved, giving impunity to loyal pirate bands, selling fishing licenses to foreign vessels, and paying pirates to disrupt their rivals’ shipments of arms and food aid.

The level of piracy ebbed and flowed over the next decade as warlords with different loyalties struggled for power. Attacks skyrocketed in early 2007 after the government headed by the Islamic Courts Union was overthrown by a U.S.-backed Ethiopian force, ending the brief period of law and order that existed under the popular Islamist regime. In recent months the pirates have become increasingly bold, attacking larger ships further from shore with more advanced weaponry. Nevertheless, most of their rhetoric still reflects their vigilante roots: the bands have names such as “The Somali Marines” and “The Somali Coast Guard.”

It can be argued that some of the captured ships are a greater threat to international security than the pirates themselves. The Faina was carrying weapons that were allegedly destined to re-ignite the conflict in Southern Sudan, while an Iranian vessel hijacked in August 2008 was carrying chemical weapons destined for Eritrea. Although the pirates’ claim to be a benevolent coastal defence force is an exaggeration, they are nevertheless (at least accidentally) performing a security function that is usually reserved for government.

Piracy is a violation of international law, just like illegal fishing and the dumping of toxic waste. But international law fails to deal with these problems in Somalia because its primary means of enforcement is self-help. According this this doctrine, the Somali state is responsible for combating piracy and illegal fishing in Somali waters, while flag states are responsible for defending their ships from pirates in international waters. The former responsibilities are neglected because Somalia is a failed state, while the latter is neglected because no flag state is willing to take the burden of securing the high seas. How does the international community intend to resolve this problem?

The short answer is that it doesn’t. Since the capture of the MV Faina made international headlines, naval forces from Canada, the U.S., Denmark, Britain, France, and Russia have begun patrolling the region. They face a nearly impossible task, akin to a dozen or so police cruisers patrolling the entire province of Alberta. This is no secret to the Navy brass: pirate patrols are seen as a training exercise, an opportunity for sailors to gain real-world combat experience. Like the vast majority of hijacked ships, the Faina was released only after a multi-million dollar ransom was paid in February.

The real losers in the game, however, are the Somali people. Their suffering and vulnerability first exploited by the whole world for over a decade, they have now been reduced to practice targets for baby-faced Western seamen. Until a semblance of order is re-established on land, this embarrassing exercise will continue unabated.

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Today is Election Day in Israel

2009-02-10T00:53:00.008-05:00

She expressed to me her clear dislike of him both as a politician and as an uncle. The word "asshole" was used many times.

Tuesday, February 10th 2009, is election day in Israel.

The biggest problem with the way the Western media reports international conflicts lies in its tendency to homogenize each opposing side. In reality, the domestic political situations in both Israel and Palestine are complex; each has many different characters and movements struggling for power. Not only do these domestic power struggles alter the course of the "peace process," but leaders constantly revise their respective bilateral stances in order to lure public opinion. In many ways, power struggles within each entity have coloured the decades-old conflict as much as issues of land or religion.

There are 34 registered political parties in Israel who compete for seats in Parliament under a proportional representation system. Any party with at least 2% of the vote is eligible for its share of seats in the Knesset, so in practice there are usually about a dozen different parties represented. Since the winning party might only get a quarter of the seats, they need to form coalitions with smaller parties in order to govern.

Some parties want peace and are willing to negotiate for a two-state solution in good faith with the Palestinians. Others might negotiate, but generally in bad faith. Some want to expel all Arabs from the Palestinian territories in order to create a "greater Israel." Other parties exist to represent the interests of Arab Israelis specifically. One wants to give the Palestinians MORE land but strip Arab Israelis of citizenship into order to keep Israel Jewish. Another wants Israel to strip religion from its national identity altogether. One even exists solely to protect the interests of pensioners. As you can see, this is quite a carnival.

It is important to note that each party has a different agenda in Israeli politics, and a different conception of what it means to be Israeli and to "support Israel". It has been only sixty years since the country nearly broke down into civil war between leftist and rightist factions. Such divisions are now usually discussed peacefully, but they are still very real.

It appears at this point that the election will be a close race between Tzipi Livni's Kadima party and Benjamin Netanyahu's Likud, with the latter more likely to win. Netanyahu opposes a Palestinian state and opposed the closure of the Gaza Strip settlements in 2005. I went to dinner and a cockfight with his niece while in northern Ecuador last summer. She expressed to me her clear dislike of him both as a politician and as an uncle. The word "asshole" was used many times.

Assuming that Netanyahu will win, we will find ourselves in a situation where the two most prominent parties in the Israeli-Palestinians dispute (Likud and Hamas) do not recognize each others' right to exist. The worst possible outcome from this arrangement is that these two groups will increase the level of violence in order to radicalize their respective populations and draw voters away from more moderate parties. Fear can get you votes in Israel just as easily as it can in the United States, but there is plenty more fear to go around.

On the other hand, if Hamas and Likud can agree on a workable framework for a multi-year truce, it will be easier to get the moderate parties to sign on than if the situation were reversed. A development like this could be a new beginning for the region and signal the start of a long healing process. Israelis will have to renew their reputation with their neighbours and the broader international community. Palestinians will have to turn their attention to the widespread post-traumatic stress disorder that affects their population, and work to combat the growing tide of religious extremism that is poisoning what was once the Arab world's most progressive enclave. Even with the best possible outcome, it will be another fifty years before life in this region gains a sense of normalcy.

Historically speaking, to predict chaos in the Middle East has generally been a safe bet. Despite the glimmer of hope in the previous paragraph, I suspect that it will continue to be so. ...but you never know. Few would have predicted in May 1977 that Israel and Egypt would sign a peace deal within two years. In a decade full of surprises on the international scene, I hope that there are a still few pleasant ones yet to come.

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