Get ready for a dry, depressing fall.

Yes, you read that properly: flavoured blunt wraps will be illegal, and unflavoured ones will only be sold in packs of 20. So if you like your vanilla-flavoured blunts, you better start writing your MP.

Get ready for a dry, depressing fall.

Young Canadians are generally proud of the quality and quantity of marijuana they smoke. We smoke more pot per capita than any Western country, and the drug is on the cusp of becoming socially normal. From Northern Lights #5 to White Lotus, some of the best strains of pot in the world were created by Canadian growers. By comparison, the pot that sells on the street in Atlanta or St. Louis is so gross that Canadians wouldn’t smoke it. That's right, Canada is a giant 420 party, complete with ketchup chips and poutine to cure the inevitable munchies.

But this fall, things won’t be nearly as fun as they have been. There are a few reasons:

Problem 1: Shitty fuckin' weather
A wet and cold summer in most of Eastern Canada is making for the worst outdoor season in years. Pot grows best in hot sun and well-drained soil; this cold and wet weather will reduce the outdoor crop by up to 20% if things don’t change soon. So if you’re expecting the fall market to be flooded with $120 ounces like it is most years, better revise those expectations.

Problem 2: SmartMeters
Ontario is implementing the SmartMeter program, which allows the hydro company to monitor electricity usage in 15-minute intervals. If the meter is temporarily disabled while a big-time grower sets up the bypass, police will be notified automatically and the grower will get busted. In the past, medium-sized grow houses that weren’t stealing electricity could conceal their excess power usage by saving energy in other ways. But soon HydroOne will be able to detect if a house’s power usage is running in 16/8 or 12/12 light cycles. That will be a dead giveaway that there’s a grow-op in the house, and more small-time growers will get busted as well. At this point no one is sure if the SmartMeter will be used in this way—or if it will work—but the whole industry is spooked already.

Problem 3: Bill C-15
Bill C-15 passed its final reading in the House of Commons on June 8th, and will move through the Senate when Parliament resumes this fall. One of its most controversial clauses is a mandatory six-month prison sentence for growing a single pot plant in your garden. Officially, this rule is void if the production is not for the purpose of trafficking, but if your harvest is greater than 30 grams, the tradition is to assume that it you're selling at least some of it.

The bill won’t stop the big-time growers that are connected to organized crime: they usually get jail time anyway. But it will cut down on the mom-and-pop houses and all of those homeowners who harvest a couple of pounds from their backyard every fall. These otherwise law-abiding citizens—and all of the friends they supply—will turn to the criminal market for their weed. This will drive prices up for everyone else.

For the record, the bill was passed with the support of most Conservatives and all Liberals. The NDP and the Bloc Quebecois were opposed. Think of that when their campaign teams come to your door.

Problem 4: Bill C-32
Bill C-32 has passed through the Committee stage in the House of Commons, and a vote is pending this fall. Also known as the Cracking Down on Tobacco Marketing Aimed at Youth Act, the intention of the bill is to ban the sale of individually-wrapped bubble-gum flavoured mini cigars, which politicians say are designed to entice kids to start smoking. As a side effect, the bill in its current form will also ban all flavoured blunt wraps and require that unflavoured ones be sold in packs of 20. Yes, you read that properly: flavoured blunt wraps will be illegal, and unflavoured ones will only be sold in packs of 20. So if you like your vanilla-flavoured blunts, you better start writing your MP.

***

So it looks like dire straits for the Canadian marijuana industry. The only thing we still have going for us is that the dollar has strengthened since the beginning of the year. Last winter, the tanking Canadian dollar was pushing prices up at the pound level as dealers moved their product south at a rate not seen since 2004. To the relief of stoners across the country, the dollar rebounded and the south-bound flow has mostly stopped.

But that's little solace considering the rest of this bullshit., ain't it? Better start stocking up on those vanilla blunts before its too late.

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